July 2005
9 posts
1 tag
It’s Electric If you’re wondering what all of that screaming you heard last night around seven was about, here’s your answer: My power is back on, bitches! Sweet, sweet mercy, oh the things I can do. I can heat food! I can tame my hair! I can see past nine o’clock in the evening! I can view the three channels my cableless TV picks up! But best of all, my beer will be...
1 tag
Four Days Without Power and Counting This cheered me up. Yes, it is a video of my dog drinking wine. She prefers Clos Du Boi Garcia Chardonnay.
1 tag
Accidental Vacation why internet access, dental work and electricity are for the weak Lots of things happened this week and God was all, “no internet access for awhile, okay?” What follows is a small, small sampling of the events leading up to me moving back in with my parents for a few days and going out on two pseudo-dates: Have I mentioned that I live down the street from Trader...
1 tag
Do Not Get Drunk Before Your Guests Arrive and End the Night Throwing Up on Yourself part 3,425 I just realized how disturbing it must be for my recent hookup partners when they take a glance at my night stand where the following books live:
Weddings for Dummies
Grace Ormonde Wedding Style 2005
Premiere Weding Resource Guide
Smashed
Autobiography of a Fat Bride
No doubt they get the...
1 tag
Ce n’est pas une Fair it is a picture of a fair
1 tag
This is Not About a Fair
Have you ever been to a fair? Funnel cakes? Ferris wheels? Morbidly obese people scooting around as fast as they can on Rascals? Well if you haven’t, you’re totally missing out. Today I attended the Vashon Island Strawberry Festival with my lovely parents and it was truly special. I took photos. I popped balloons with darts and won a framed picture of Jesus. I...
1 tag
Putting the Curv in Scurvy
Tuesday evening the irreplaceable, embraceable Ms. Lindsay Sykes celebrated her 22nd year on this planet by hosting our questionable yet alarmingly chic band of riffraff for a night of pure revelry.
There was gin. There was tonic. But mostly there was gin.
The Fab Middle School Five were in attendance, namely Ashley, Lauren, Lindsay (of course), Marcus, and I....
1 tag
Bar Flies Last night at Dragon Fish and The Red Door
1 tag
Rabbit, Rabbit Lauren has been having a recurring dream about the two of us applying for jobs at Hooters. In her dream I am apparently quite enthusiastic about my new career path, urging her to join a special underground Hooters union. Where, I assume, we all wear orange shorts and wiggle our chi-chis around. My sleep has been on the mellow side lately, excluding a brief dream that an article of...