One More Salute to Vanity

Finally, a film for my demographic. I can’t wait for the sequel, Everybody Loves Alcohol. See also:

• Everybody Knows Your Ovaries Get Lonely
• Everybody Wishes You the Best on Your Downward Slope to 30
• Everybody Hates Your Gluten Allergy

Ferran Adria Eat Your Heart Out

Me: Like El Bulli, I'm going to start my own food foundation. But I'll open it in 2013 and be like "BOOYA! look at my floating eggs!" You want in?
Whitney: YES. "HELLO, SUCKAS! COME DRINK MY FOAM!"
Me: "I farted in this jar in 2010 so you could enjoy it in 2013. Now put on this unitard and lick the wall paper"
Whitney: "That's not puff paint, it's solid gold duck semen, and it's delicious."
Me: It's a fucking CELEBRATION.